Postponing Motherhood may be good for Busy Women but not for their Children

Posted by PITHOCRATES - April 17th, 2014

Week in Review

Once upon a time I was having a conversation with a consultant.  He was bald.  And not in the best of shape.  He looked older than he was.  He started a family later in life.  And one of the worst days of his life was when a waitress said how cute his grandson was.  Because he looked like a grandfather.  Even though he was only a father.

I had a coworker who died from a heart attack while on vacation.  Running around with his grade-school-aged children.  Another father who started his family later in life.  It was not a problem for him.  For men don’t have a biological clock ticking.  So they can start a family as late as they want to in their life.  But they may not live to see their children graduate from high school.  Which is a horrible thing for a child.

This was something women were spared.  Because they have a biological clock ticking.  And couldn’t put off becoming a mother until they were ‘grandmother age’.  Until now, that is (see Later, Baby: Will Freezing Your Eggs Free Your Career? by Emma Rosenblum posted 4/17/2014 on BloombergBusinessweek Technology).

LaJoie fits the typical profile of an egg freezer: They’re great at their jobs, they make a ton of money, and they’ve followed all of Sheryl Sandberg’s advice. But the husband and baby haven’t materialized, and they can recite the stats about their rapidly decreasing fertility as a depressing party trick. For LaJoie, now 45, it was demoralizing to see friend after friend get married and have kids, while she was stuck at the hospital without romantic prospects.

“You feel bad about yourself, like you’re the odd man out, and somehow you’ve messed up on your path,” says Sarah Elizabeth Richards, who spent $50,000 freezing several rounds of eggs in 2006 to 2008 and wrote a book about the experience, Motherhood, Rescheduled: The New Frontier of Egg Freezing and the Women Who Tried It. “By freezing, you’ve done something about it. You’re walking taller; your head is held higher. And that can pay off in both your work and romantic lives.” Richards, now 43, is dating someone promising and says she’d like to thaw her eggs in the next year or so. She’s also at work on a new book and plans on finishing it before she tries to get pregnant. “Egg freezing gives you the gift of time to start a family, but it’s also, like, here’s how many years I actually have left for my other goals—what can I do with them?”

LaJoie got married soon after she froze (she told her husband about it on their very first date: “I was upfront and said, ‘This is my plan.’ He was, like, ‘OK!’ ”) and had her first baby naturally at 39. A few years later, after briefly trying fertility drugs, she thawed her eggs. The implantation worked, and her second son is 2 years old.

This is great news for women who want to conveniently work in the burden of being a mother somewhere in their busy schedules.  But when you have a child at 43 you will be 51 at that child’s high school graduation.  Old enough to be a grandmother.  While the grandmother may be in a nursing home.  Who may only see her grandchildren on holidays when they reluctantly visit her.  For nursing homes are not places children want to be.

And you could be dead by your child’s graduation.  For a lot of health issues can plague you by the time you turn 51.  Especially when you’re having your children in your 40s.  The risk of breast cancer increases with age.  The risk of hypertension and pre-eclampsia/eclampsia increase with age.  The risk of gestational diabetes increases with age.  The risk of heart disease increases with age.  As does the risk of other cancers, lupus, diabetes, pancreatitis, etc.  Things not that common for women in their 20s and 30s.  But more common for women over 40.

And babies have risks, too, when their mothers give birth when over 40.  The risk of stillbirths and miscarriages increase with age.  As does the risk for birth defects.  So it’s all well and good for the mother to postpone motherhood but it’s not the best thing for her children.  Who deserve young and healthy parents.  Who can run with them while on vacation.  And they deserve healthy grandparents to spoil them.  Things you may not be able to do if you postpone motherhood until after you’re 40.

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More Forgotten Children die in Cars but there is no Demand for new Car Legislation

Posted by PITHOCRATES - July 6th, 2013

Week in Review

Whenever a child dies accidentally because of a gun there is another push to pass gun control legislation.  While making derogatory comments about gun owners.  For if it wasn’t for these yahoos putting pressure on their representatives in Congress they would have already done the right thing.  And repealed the Second Amendment.  So there wouldn’t be guns in houses where children can find them.  But it is a little different when children die accidentally in other ways (see Baby boy dies after being left in car in Virginia by Clarence Williams and Martin Weil posted 6/6/2013 on The Washington Post).

An 8-month-old boy died Friday after he was apparently left in his mother’s car while she was at work, Alexandria police said…

Bergin said the mother intended to drop the child off at day care. It was not clear why she did not…

Also on Friday, Baltimore County police said a toddler died after being left in a vehicle in Lansdowne, police said.

A relative was supposed to take 16-month-old Sabriya Towels to a Head Start Center on Friday after picking her up at another location but instead drove to their home in Baltimore, went inside and slept for a few hours, police said.

Police said that about four hours later, the relative, who was not Sabrinya’s parent, went to the Head Start Center to pick up the toddler and realized she was not there. He then ran to his vehicle and found the girl inside…

The Web site Kids and Cars. org said that on average, 38 children die in hot cars each year after being trapped inside.

“Even the best of parents or caregivers can overlook a sleeping baby in a car,” the Web site says.

People who accidentally left a child in a locked car to die are not horrible people like those gun owners.  These people can be “even the best of parents and caregivers.”  While no such sentiments will ever appear about a gun owner.  Even though both may accidentally kill a child.  Horrible things to have to live with.  But is a forgetful person who doesn’t lock away their gun when the grandchildren come to visit any more horrible than a forgetful parent or caregiver who forgets a child in a car?  No.

Is this a commentary on today’s idea of what a woman should be?  Instead of a stay-at-home mom she should have both a career and a family?  As well as an intense schedule that can suck the life out of her?  While making her miss being a part of her children’s childhoods?  Instead farming a good portion of that out to childcare?  Perhaps.  Mothers should be able to enjoy being a mother without feeling guilty for not having a career, too.  For her job as mother is far more important and far more satisfying than any career she could have.  For even movie stars who have lives every woman envies does not feel complete until they become mothers.  And when they do we celebrate their motherhood.  And yet the left will disparage a woman who doesn’t pursue a career.  Choosing instead to be a stay-at-home mother.  As they did during the 2012 debate.  When someone said Ann Romney never had a real job in her life.  Because all she did was raise 5 children.

There are a lot of double standards when it comes to the left.  Whether it is the ‘best of parents or caregivers’ and ‘evil, rotten gun owners’ when it comes to the accidental death of children.  Or working moms and stay-at-home moms when it comes to their idea of a real woman.  Everything the left does has but one purpose.  To advance a political agenda.  Even if it means we place so many burdens on women today that they forget about their children in the back seat of their cars.  At which point they’ll rue forever the day they chose to build a career.

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Women are Choosing to get Paid Less so they can have More Time to be Mothers

Posted by PITHOCRATES - June 16th, 2013

Week in Review

If you listen to some politicians there is a war on women.  Especially in the workplace.  Where evil business owners pay women less than they pay men.  At least that’s what the data aggregate tells us.  That business owners are not only greedy but sexist.  But there appears to be more to the unequal pay between men and women than the data aggregate shows (see Let’s Not Forget, Many Working Moms Want To Work Less by Erika Christakis posted 6/12/2013 on Time Ideas).

It’s almost become a cliché to note that women are still under-earning compared to men in the workforce. But maybe this reality shouldn’t keep surprising us. The recent headlines miss an important part of the work-life balance story: plenty of working mothers are earning less than men because they want the sort of jobs and working arrangements which indeed pay less…

The benefits of part-time work are substantial. Parents can be wage earners and role models without, literally, losing sleep. They can preserve most of their professional identity and work skills but still provide support to a wider group of dependents than would be possible with a full-time schedule, and without going insane in the process…

It’s true that the trend toward part-time, benefit-free employment can be financially ruinous to individual workers. One fifth of the country’s jobs are part-time, and many are low-skilled, dead end positions. But it’s easy to overlook how unrewarding full-time employment can be for many people, too – especially when the researchers and reporters and pundits who write about workforce trends tend to have fascinating, flexible jobs with decent pay.

We should stop limiting what women and men value by insisting that everyone has the same work aspirations. Some of us don’t want to spend the most productive and precious years of our lives trapped at the water cooler with our ‘work spouses,’ and we’re willing to pay the price.

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.  Makes Jane a dull girl, too, as it turns out.  Apparently mothers want to spend time being a mother.  Oh, how the left must hate this.  What with their birth control, abortion and morning after pills.  They want to see every woman childless and working fulltime.  Preferably taking a job away from a man.  Earning a big fat paycheck.  And paying a lot of income taxes.  Perhaps the true reason the left wants women in careers.  Stay-at-home mothers pay no income taxes.  That’s the whole drive behind state-funded childcare.  To get women back into the workforce as quickly as possible.  So they can resume paying income taxes.  Which is why the left demonizes conservatives.  And the 1950s family.  The Donna Reeds and June Cleavers.  Who were happy to spend time raising their children.  The very thought of which makes the left want to collectively vomit.

Motherhood is not something to shun.  To disparage.  Or to attack.  Women aren’t less of a woman for wanting to spend more time with their family.  Instead of shipping their kids off to childcare so they can work fulltime.  Because one day they’ll stop and notice that their kids are no longer kids.  But going off to college.  And they’ll wonder where did the time go.  As well as their childhoods.  Wondering where they were when their kids grew up so fast.  Then they’ll look at the big house.  The two new cars.  The nice things in their home.  And the empty rooms where their children once played.  Then ask themselves, was it worth it?

A lot of women are saying “no.”  It’s not worth it.  So they’re taking part-time jobs so they can spend more time with their kids.  Which is why in the aggregate businesses are paying women less than men.  Because women chose jobs that pay less.  So they can spend time doing something more important.  And more fulfilling.  Being a mother.  And God bless them for it.

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FT140: “There’s more to women than their vaginas.” —Old Pithy

Posted by PITHOCRATES - October 19th, 2012

Fundamental Truth

The Republicans don’t Treat Women like the Taliban Treats Women despite what the Left Says

Is there a war on women?  You would think so if you listen to the Democrats.  Who are shouting from the rooftops that the Republicans are waging a war on women.  That they want to impose nothing less than Sharia Law when it comes to women.  To prevent women from having abortions.  To take away their birth control.  To take away their cancer screening.  Forcing women to give up their careers.  And forcing them into motherhood.  Keeping them barefoot and pregnant.  Doing nothing but having babies and raising kids.  Which according to the Left is worse than 18th century slavery.  Even though women with careers are still having families later in their lives.  Because despite motherhood being worse than 18th century slavery a lot of women still want to raise a family.

Of course this Republican war on women is nonsense.  For they said the same things during the 2 election cycles of George W. bush.  The one election cycle of George H.W. Bush.  The 2 election cycles of Ronald Reagan.  During these 20 years of Republican administrations what the Left warned about never came to be.  There was no Sharia Law imposed on women.  Women were as free as they ever were.  There were no morality police.  There was still porn, strip clubs and prostitution during these years.  Birth control was still available.  Abortion, too.  And, yes, even cancer screening.   Those of us with mothers, wives, sisters and daughters who entered these Republican times emerged from these Republican times with their mothers, wives, sisters and daughters.  For the Republicans didn’t treat women like the Taliban treats women.  Despite what the Left says.

Those old enough to remember previous election cycles have heard this war on women rhetoric so often that it becomes white noise that we just tune out.  We don’t take it seriously.  We take it for what it is.  Subterfuge.  The Left’s policies have a record of failure.  Especially their Keynesian economic policies.  Which gave us the stagflation of the Seventies.  The subprime mortgage crisis.  And the Great Recession.  For expansionary monetary policies extend economic booms allowing prices to rise higher than the market would have them.  So the recessions that follow to correct these prices are longer and more painful.  As those prices have a lot farther to fall.  So when your policies have a history of failure it is hard to run on those policies.  So you attack your opponents.  And not their policies.  Because they know conservative policies are better than theirs.

Because of Birth Control and Abortion Men don’t have to Bother with Romance

So who does this strategy work on?  Young people.  People without any real responsibilities yet.  Young women empowering themselves by having sex if they choose to have sex.  And the young men having sex with them.  The women want birth control to be able to have sex without getting pregnant.  And they want access to abortion.  Just in case that birth control doesn’t work.  Or if they surrender to their passions without taking any precautions.  While the young men are always for anything that increases their chances of having sex with the ladies.  So, yes, these young women may lead with their vaginas when it comes to politics.  And vote Democrat just because of their reproductive rights.  For it may be the only thing important in their lives.  As women’s reproductive rights empower women.  It lets them escape the tyranny of motherhood that is little different than 18th century slavery.  It lets them to proudly take control of their sexuality.  At any time they choose.  Whenever they please.  But it’s a different story with men.

Women don’t like men objectifying them.  Which is why they get exasperated.  And say things like, “My eyes are up here.”  Or, “Keep it holstered, buddy.”  As men have only one thing on their mind.  The empowerment of women.  That is, sex.  A lot of women are put off by the constant sexual advances of men.  They decry that all they want is sex.  That they don’t want to talk to them.  To get to know them as a person.  To take long walks on a beach.  Go ballroom dancing.  To take them to the ballet.  To simply hold hands.  Or discuss a book that changed their lives.  Men are just not interested in anything but getting them into bed.  They hit on the pretty ladies in the office.  Making some women uncomfortable.  Some even filing complaints because their behavior makes a hostile workplace.  So women can empower themselves with birth control and access to abortion so they can fully explore their sexuality whenever they want without any shame but when men think about sex they’re just a bunch of dirty old men and perverts.

So reproductive rights kind of send mixed messages to men and women.  It means women can be more sexually active.  Empowering them to explore their sexuality.  Freely and without shame.  Something men understand.  Which leads to them objectifying women.  Because with birth control and abortion men don’t have to bother with romance.  Or wait for marriage.  Because with birth control and abortion men just expect women to have sex without the bother of romance.  Just like Charlie Harper on Two and Half Men.  A character his female company grew to hate.  As shown in the opening of the new season after they fired Charlie Sheen.  Where many of his past lady friends attending his funeral lamented the closed-casket ceremony.  Because they couldn’t spit in Charlie’s face.  Funny.  Because a lot of women feel that way about men like Charlie Harper.  Men who enjoy nothing more than the empowerment of women.

Those on the Right don’t believe Women are One Dimensional

So this is what women are to those on the Left.  Vaginas.  One dimensional people.  Who care about nothing but birth control and abortion.  Which is rather sexist.  The reason why the Left wants to provide women with birth control and abortion is so they can have careers like men.  While still having a good time like men.  Who have careers.  And enjoy casual sex.

But while these men can also be interested in the economy, the unemployment rate, interest rates, the inflation rate, the federal deficit, the federal debt, the impact of the federal debt on their children, national security, property taxes, income taxes, the cost of gasoline, food prices, heating costs, their kids’ public schools, etc., women cannot.  No, they can have no other interests but their reproductive rights.  At least according to those on the Left.  Something those on the Right find offensive.  As they’re talking about our mothers, wives, sisters and daughters.

Those on the Right don’t believe women are one dimensional.  They believe that there’s more to women than their vaginas.  We don’t believe those things men can be interested in are too complex for women.  For we believe women can be just as smart as men.  Even smarter.  And they can actually be interested in something other than their vaginas.

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53% of all Births to Women under 30 are born to Single Women

Posted by PITHOCRATES - February 26th, 2012

Week in Review

The feminists may have freed women from the hell of wedded bliss but this new empowerment and sexual liberty has led to an even worse hell.  The hell of single motherhood (see Family Fact of the Week: Majority of Births to Women Under 30 Are to Single Moms by Rachel Sheffield posted 2/24/2012 on The Foundry).

Unwed childbearing has been on the rise for more than five decades, and today more than 40 percent of U.S. children are born to single women. A new study additionally reveals that the majority—53 percent—of births to women under 30 occur outside of marriage…

However, unwed childbearing isn’t the norm for all young women. In fact, for the college-educated it is still very uncommon. The majority of births are instead to women with a high school diploma or less…

The increasing rate of unwed childbearing, as well as the corresponding breakdown of marriage, in low- and middle-income America is creating a divided society split along the lines of marriage and education.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.  Encouraging women to empower themselves with consequence-free sex wasn’t suppose to lead to consequences.  And apparently the men who impregnated these women aren’t doing the honorable thing.  Probably because doing the honorable thing was the last thing on their mind when they were enjoying a woman’s empowerment.

The feminists have freed women from men.  Allowed them to be their own people.  And encouraged them into a life very similar to that wedded bliss the feminists rescued them from.  Only without a husband to help pay the bills and raise the children.  I’m not sure how women are better off this way.  Or their children.

Of course the societal split along the lines of marriage and education will have the feminists countering that they need to get into the high schools to teach these girls about family planning.  Especially the ones that don’t go on to college.  Give them more birth control.  And easier access to abortion.  Anything but marriage.  Because that’s a kind of hell they would wish on no woman.  Despite so many women wanting this life.  At least, based on the television and movies they watch.  Where a man and a woman end up married and live happily ever after.  I mean, there’s a reason why they call romantic comedies ‘chic flics’.  Because it’s the women who watch them.  And want to live the fairy tale.  To live happily ever after.  Something the feminists have been working hard to prevent these last 5 decades or so.

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LESSONS LEARNED #12: “Feminists will forgive misogyny if the misogynist is a self-proclaimed feminist.” -Old Pithy

Posted by PITHOCRATES - May 6th, 2010

MOST WHO CONSIDER themselves feminists aren’t very militant.  And most aren’t probably that hardcore on the ‘equal’ thing.  Men and women are different.  They know this.  And that’s okay.  Many feminists don’t mind when a man holds a door for them.  Or that they have to sit down to pee.  You don’t have to be a man.  You can enjoy your femininity and have a career.  No one says you can’t.  Well, almost no one.

There is a very loud, a very angry and a very militant group of feminists that beg to differ.  It’s not that big of a group.  It seems like it, but that’s just because they get some prime exposure.  In the entertainment industry.  Some media outlets.  And through some rich and powerful friends.

This group believes in absolute equality.  You don’t dare hold a door for them.  Or compliment them on their appearance.  And if you ever think about patting them on the fanny, just realize that you may lose that hand in the process.  And probably your two best friends as well.  Then they’ll say something like “how do you like me now, bitch” to the newly castrated man.

Don’t call them the fairer sex.  Or the weaker sex.  They don’t like it.  They can be crude in their speech for they eschew any preconceived notions of lady-like behavior.    They’ll drop the f-bomb at will and ask a guy how’s it hanging.  They like their behavior rough and coarse.  Just like a man’s.  Like I said, absolute equality.

THESE HARDCORE MILITANT feminists (HMFs) have one overriding concern.  And that is not to let anything interfere with their chosen career or profession.  Anything.  And they’ve had some successes.  Glass ceilings have been shattering and restraints on women’s advancement are falling.  Everywhere.  Everywhere but one.  The uterus.

The HMFs don’t just eschew lady-like behavior, they detest the biological tyranny of the female reproductive system.  The uterus has destroyed more careers than the exclusivity of any old boys club.  Pregnancy.  The scourge of unbridled advancement in the HMF’s world.  Bodily change.  Leaves of absence.  And the possibility that the temporary leave may become a permanent one.  Motherhood.  Children.  The very thought of it sickens them.  And infuriates them.  It just ain’t fair.

They fight this oppression with religious fervor.  And their vehicle is reproductive rights.  Abortion.  It is their holy grail.  They’ve fought long and hard to get it.  And, by god, they intend to keep it.  And they base their political world on it.

At least, that’s what one would surmise based on the historical evidence.

CONDOLEEZA RICE HAS had a remarkable career that set a lot of firsts.  She has an incredible resume and achieved everything on it on her own.  From her PhD in political science to the third most powerful position in the country, Secretary of State, and everything in between, she worked hard and advanced herself.  On pure merit.  Unlike Hillary Clinton whose rise to fame was courtesy of the coattails of a successful man.

You would think that between the two, feminists would hold up Rice as the ideal.  She made it in the man’s world.  Shattered ceilings.  Set records.  Was in fact more successful than most men.  Clinton had to go old school and rely on a successful marriage for political success.  But, of course, it is Clinton they hold up as the ideal.  Not Rice.  Why?

Clinton is a Democrat.  Rice is a Republican.  Clinton is pro-choice.  Rice is less so.  Though very religious, she is kind of libertarian when it comes to abortion.  She’s not pro on-demand abortion.  She believes there should be certain restrictions.  And that’s enough.  Between the two, Clinton supports abortion more.  So the HMFs hold her up as the ideal.

STAND BY YOUR man.  Not exactly a feminist dictate.  If a woman’s husband has a history of extramarital activity, few feminists would say to stand by that man.  They may say something like if he has a problem keeping it in his pants, then just cut it off.  For there are few things as hurtful and humiliating than infidelity.

Bill Clinton has apparently had a problem of keeping it in his pants.  There’ve been many accusations about many women.  The Clintons met all of these with righteous indignation.  His wife attributed them to political attacks from a vast right wing conspiracy.  And she stood by her man.  Even after the infamous blue dress.

Well, it turned out that at least one of the accusations were true.  Now, Bill Clinton was personable, but he was no George Clooney.  Or a Tom Jones.  Women weren’t throwing their panties at him.  He just wasn’t sexy.  So it wasn’t a passionate animal attraction.  No, it wasn’t that.  It was power.  He was the most powerful man in America.  And she was just a 20 something year old intern.  He was 50ish.  He took advantage of her awe of his power.  And stuck his penis in her mouth.  And a cigar tube in her vagina.  But it wasn’t a big deal.  Most men just joked about it.  Thought it was pretty cool.  As long it wasn’t their daughter’s mouth.  Or their daughter’s vagina.

MEN ARE PIGS.  It’s no secret.  So it’s no big shock that a lot of men were okay with a little oral sex in the Oval Office.  They look at the young women in their offices.  They talk about them.  What they would like to do with them.  Some go too far.  Abuse their position of power.  They make inappropriate remarks.  Inappropriate contact.  And then all hell breaks loose.  And rightly so.

Get a job today and you have to sit through compulsory sexual harassment training.  Before you start working.  Employers live in fear of sexual harassment.  If they don’t do enough to prevent it, or if they don’t act fast enough when it happens, the lawyers sue.  The lawyers sue even when they do.  It’s a minefield.  One misstep along the way and BOOM.  Lawsuit.  We will not tolerate any abuse of power.  Unless, of course, you’re president of the United States.

WHAT IS MISOGYNY?  A hatred of women.  Objectifying them for pleasure.  The attitude that women are good for only one thing.  Sex.  A misogynist may ‘love’ being with women, but he doesn’t necessarily want to be with them.  Talk to them.  Or see them still there the following morning.  And he may leave cab fare out so they won’t be there later that evening after he’s ‘done’ with them.  Think of Charlie Harper from the television show Two and a Half Men.

A man that habitually cheats on his wife is a misogynist.  He doesn’t respect his wife.  Or the women he’s fooling around with.  He’s just having a good time.  Using them.  To fulfill some animal desire.  Thinking with the little head.  Always.

JFK was fooling around.  Teddy, too.  Two women died as a result.  Marilyn Monroe committed suicide.  Did she want more than JFK was willing to give?  Did she kill herself because of this?  We’ll never know.  All that we know is that she had sex with JFK.  And that she was depressed.

Ted Kennedy was probably going to have sex with Mary Jo Kopechne when he accidentally drove off that bridge.  His pregnant wife was home in bed at the time.  Kennedy panicked and left Kopechne to die.  This may have dashed his presidential ambitions, but he remained in the Senate for another 40 years or so.  A stalwart liberal.  The HMFs stood by him.  And JFK (posthumously, of course).  Teddy was pro-choice.  And a Catholic.  Talk about a coup for feminism.  They loved this man.  And never abandoned him.  I mean, Catholicism is about as anti-abortion as you can get.  In another era, the church would have excommunicated Teddy for such blasphemy.

The feminists never abandoned Clinton, either.  Bill or Hillary.  Why?  They’re pro-choice.  And with them in power, the HMFs know abortion will stay a choice.  So they will forgive the misogyny.  It’s like a ‘get out of jail free’ card.  In their world, he just didn’t do anything that bad.  Unlike someone else.

SAY THE NAME and the invectives fly.  Sarah Palin.  My, how the Left hates her.  And the HMFs.  Here’s another successful career woman, too.  She earned everything herself.  Didn’t marry into anything.  Again, a feminist ideal they could hold up for all young girls to emulate.  But they hate her.  Why?

They hate Sarah Palin because she’s that 1950s mom AND a successful career woman.  That just ain’t supposed to happen.  Remember, having babies is the scourge of career advancement.  Add to that the fact that she didn’t abort her last pregnancy after already having had 4 children.  Compound that with the fact that she didn’t change her mind about abortion after finding out her last baby would be born with Down Syndrome. 

Palin makes a mockery of the HMFs version of feminism.  Babies destroy careers.  Ergo, to succeed in a career, you can’t have babies.  But, being in a modern, liberated age, accidents happen.  And no one should punish a career woman for doing anything more than a man did.  She should be able to keep her career.  And abortion lets her.  That’s the model.  And then along comes Palin and blows that model all to hell.

THERE ARE MANY more examples.  All with a common theme.  Misogyny is okay as long as you are a feminist.  You can do pretty much whatever you want.  They won’t attack you.  They will, though, if you are pro-life.  Even if you only ‘lean’ pro-life.  Because if you take away abortion, the biological tyranny of the female reproductive system will go on unchecked.  And absolute equality will be but a fleeting memory.

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FUNDAMENTAL TRUTH #12: “Feminists will forgive misogyny if the misogynist is a self-proclaimed feminist.” -Old Pithy

Posted by PITHOCRATES - May 4th, 2010

WHEN YOU FELL and scratched your knee, your mother kissed the booboo and wiped away your tears.  When you got lost at the store you cried until your mother found you.  And when she did, she hugged you and instantly made the world a safe and happy place again.  The best part of the first day of school had nothing to do with school.  It was after school when you saw your mother standing at the door, waiting for you.

Dads are important, too.  And they do a lot for us.  More than we can ever thank them for.  But when it comes to that nurturing love we ache for, it’s Mom we turn to.  Because moms are nurturing.

In most species, it is the female that nurtures her young while the male provides.  Or abandons.  That’s why Mother’s Day is a bigger holiday than Father’s Day.  When grown, you may have a beer with Dad on Father’s Day.  But you send flowers on Mother’s Day. 

There is a bond between mother and child.  That’s what spending 9 months together as one will do to you.  And it survives.  Even in divorce.  Traditionally, a divorce favors the mother when it comes to custody.  Because of their nurturing role.  And the father works to provide child support while the mother stays at home and nurtures their children.

FEMINISM CALLS FOR equality between the sexes.  Feminists note that employers pay women less then they pay men for the same work.  It’s an outrage, they say.  But is it?  Can a person’s sex factor into the ‘value’ of an employee?

Sorry, Mom, but the answer is ‘yes’.  At times.  Sometimes.  Not all times.  But sometimes.

When an employer is considering hiring someone, they have to consider many things.  Many candidates are thinking short-term.  They want a job.  They may pad their resume and say things during an interview they think the interviewer wants to hear.  Even lie.  Just a little.  It’s all about getting the job.  And if it turns out that they don’t like the job, why, they can always quit.

Employers are thinking long term.  They’re looking for someone who will be there next week.  And next year.  And the year after that.  No one comes ‘ready to work’.  It takes time to bring an employee on board and make them an integral part of the team.  And once they are integral, employers depend on them.  Need them.  Projects suffer when they’re down with the flu or take a leave of absence.  Others have to carry their load.  And if it’s near the end of a 3 year project, that can be difficult.  You need to make decisions based on the history of the past 2+ years.  And if that key employee isn’t there, neither is that history.  The project suffers.  The company suffers.

THE IDEAL EMPLOYEE is the father of the nuclear family.  The mother is home raising the children allowing the husband more time to work.  With a family to raise and provide for, the husband will go home after work to the family, not party, and go to bed at a reasonable hour and be on time the next morning.  There’s nothing like the yoke of responsibility to suck the wild out of a person.  Younger, single people have far less of a load to shoulder.  So they’re still living in the now.  And having fun.  And sometimes show up the next morning hung over. 

The father in the nuclear family provides stability.  Employers like stability.  They don’t like unpredictable, disordering change.  Because that kind of change throws wrenches into the works of a finely tuned machine.

Even though no employer will say it publicly, women can be wrench throwers.  If she has young children and she and her husband both work, chances are that the ‘nurturer’ will be the one staying home with the kids when they are sick or when the school is closed (due to weather, boiler problem, power outage, etc.).  She may be the one taking the kids to a midday dentist appointment.  She may be the one who takes the kids to and from day-care and can’t stay late if a meeting with an out of town design team runs long.  Or fly out of town to respond to a crisis. 

Most of these are often simply inconvenient annoyances.  Sometimes they come at bad times.  But it’s a small wrench and there’s barely a ripple in the ongoing operations.  But there’s something else.  A BIG wrench.  And this can really weigh into the hiring decision making process.

WOMEN HAVE UTERUSES.  Men don’t.  If a family adds another child, the father may miss a few days of work.  Maybe take a week or so off.  But he’s coming back.  It’s different with a woman.  She’s not coming back after a couple of days.  Or a week.  No.  She’ll be gone for months.  If she even comes back. 

If an employer is interviewing for a key position on a 3 year project, this has to be a consideration.  You can’t ask a woman her motherly intentions.  Unless you want to get sued.  And if you could, 3 years is a long time.  A career woman may change her mind in a year or so.  Or there could be an ‘accident’ that leads to a change of mind.  To use a sports analogy, it could be like signing a new quarterback to a 3 year contract to take the team to the Super Bowl.  And the addition of this key player makes a difference.  In year 2 of the contract they missed the Super Bowl by one game.  Year 3 is even better.  Then, just as the postseason is about to begin, your quarterback, your key employee, suffers an injury.  And the 3-year plan comes to an inglorious end with a loss in the first postseason game.

You just don’t hire people.  You invest in them.  As with all investments, you want to minimize your risks. That’s why, all things being equal between two candidates, a man may have more ‘value’ than a woman.  Because of that BIG wildcard.  The uterus.  It could gestate one day.  It’s what uteruses do.

THE HARCORE MILITANT feminists (HMFs) know this.  And they hate it. 

The HMFs are not a fan of the 1950s stay-at-home-and-raise-a-family mom.  No, they don’t like her at all.  That woman is a second class citizen in a man’s world.  At least in the HMF eyes.  She stays at home, chained to the stove, or the bed, to serve her man while he is out in the real world living life.  Building a career.  Having 3 martini lunches.  Having a bit on the side.  HMFs see this as the height of inequality.  They want to be that man.  They want the career.  The 3 martini lunches.  They want to enjoy a bit on the side.  They want to live life.

There is really only one thing that prevents a woman from being that man.  She can get pregnant.  She can have a baby.  And when she does, she may quit her job.  Give up on her career.  Stay at home, chained to the kitchen.  Or the bed.  Have more babies which perpetuates her wretched state.  This is why reproductive rights are such a fundamental issue with HMFs.  It allows them to be that man.  It lets them overcome that one fatal weakness: pregnancy.  This lets them work, and play, like a man. 

HARDCORE MILITANT FEMINSTS don’t hate men; they hate uteruses.  They are, in fact, misogynists.  For it is the very essence of womanhood that they hate.  Motherhood.  They find it demeaning.  It’s a game changer that takes them out of the game.  That’s why they don’t hate their fellow misogynists.  No, they don’t hate them; they admire them.  They admire the power.  And that is, after all, what they want.  Power.  Go ahead and do as you do as long as you let me do it, too.  Give me the power to climb any mountain.  To negotiate any obstacle.  To get rid of any inconvenient pregnancy.  Let me have an abortion.  You do that and I will always support you no matter what you do.

www.PITHOCRATES.com

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